I was getting ready for another day at That Day Job. I was looking in the mirror, putting on my makeup with an invisible timer in my head telling me to hurry up or I would be late. Then came the mega turbo 2 minute blow dry which is usually followed by the phrase “That’ll have to do”.
And then the light went on.
Why didn’t I realize this sucks a long time ago?
Why do so many of us end up here? Doing a sucky day job for sucky wages. If I was earning the same money getting inky and painty and arty, I would think I was a genius. But when it’s for a sucky day job, you don’t feel like a genius. You feel like an idiot. An idiot getting her soul sucked. Slowly.
If your working day looks anything like mine, it goes a little something like this:
Get up at 4am. Perform Olympic gymnastics routine called “Don’t trip over the cats”. Truly the ninjas of the animal world.
Blog like a woman possessed for 2 hours. Actually blog for 2 hours and 10 minutes because “I just have to finish this”. So now I’m running behind in my perfectly timed routine which is no longer perfectly timed.
Frantically feed the furry kids while still performing that gymnastics routine. Then do social media with one hand and feed myself with the other. This girl knows how to multi task!
Perform the mad rush and minor miracle that is a shower, makeup and afore mentioned blow dry before the mad dash out the door hoping I remembered everything. There’s days I stop just to check I remembered to put my undies on.
Why? Why are we afraid to follow the thing that calls us when this shit is the alternative?
Seriously, a day job is what we should be afraid of.
Why do we wait until we are 40 (or are staring at it very closely)? Why do we wait until we can’t stand it no more. Hating the ‘have to’ of a day job suddenly gives you courage to do the things you’ve told yourself for years that you couldn’t.
When I first wrote my About page 2 years ago – I said I found myself in a day job I didn’t love but didn’t hate either. I’m figuring out it’s the worst kind of day job to have. Because when you hate it, you get the hell out. And when you love it, you are happy to do your creative business on the side. But when you don’t love or hate it – you just sit in limbo. You let the days go by. The weeks go by. And before you know it, you are celebrating another New Year’s Eve. And facing another year of the same same. Until eventually you grow to hate it.
If you are scared because you don’t know how to start. Because you don’t think you can do what your SHeros are doing. Because you aren’t smart enough or talented enough, or just that you don’t think you are enough….
Take a minute to picture what your life will look like if you don’t take that leap of faith.
Now go do something for your business. Go do something for yourself.
PS – In case you couldn’t tell, my mid life major reassessment was really getting to me this week.